I don’t remember when I first heard the phrase intention instead of resolution or who said it, but it was a couple of years ago, and it resonated with me. I found the idea of setting an intention to do something so powerful. A resolution, by definition, is a firm decision to do something. There’s no room for it not to happen. There’s no room for failure. When we make a resolution, we say we will do something no matter what it takes. We’ve set the goal, and the next step is to crush it.

In some cases, this approach works. If you’re one of those people it works for, that is amazing, and I’m incredibly happy for you. For years, I set resolutions only to slowly forget about them or decide they were unimportant. I always wished I could stick to them. I’d get so discouraged that any motivation I had left would just disappear. I’d think, why do I even bother? It’s not even worth it.

That was until I learned the concept of setting an intention to do something instead of making a resolution. For me, this was groundbreaking. What a fantastic idea, I thought, and for the first time in my life, I began to make traction with the things I wanted to achieve.

A resolution is a precise, specific goal, whereas setting an intention is a broader, more fluid idea of what we are looking to achieve. When we set an intention, we say what we want and plan to do. When we do this, we send vibrations into the universe that will attract what we seek.

When we intend to do something, it’s okay if we don’t do it perfectly. By setting an intention, we tell ourselves what we plan to do, but we also know that life is messy and plans change, so we may need to pivot. We may need to switch it up or start over. And that’s okay because no matter how often we go off course and have to regroup, we will eventually get there if we keep a clear view of our intentions.

It is so important to give yourself grace. Perfection is the killer of all dreams. Perfection is objective, and when we spend all our time striving for it, we lose sight of what is important.

For this new year, I hope that you will rethink your resolutions, and instead of setting them, you will make the conscious decision to make it your intention to work towards them, but also permit yourself to fail. Because it is in our failures that true growth happens.

If you fail, DO NOT get discouraged. Instead, give yourself grace and accept your failure. Know that failing doesn’t mean you’re finished; it means that you’re just getting started. Take a deep breath, find whatever little bit of energy you have left, and begin to pick up the pieces. Little by little, start to try again.

Think about what did work, even if it was only one small thing, and do more of that. And if there were things that didn’t work, then let them go. Don’t waste your energy on the things that don’t suit you. Life is too short. Focus on what works for you and let the rest go.

Be proud of who you are today. Love yourself today. No one else can ever be you. You are unique, and that uniqueness is what makes you beautiful.